Walking Test : Indian Forest Service Examination

Indian Forest Service (IFS) is an All India Service (AIS). One among the total three AIS, the other two being Indian Administrative Service (IAS) and Indian Police Service (IPS). The prelims exam of both civil services and IFS is the same after the changed pattern in 2013. It's just that the cutoff marks of prelims for IFS is around 15-20 marks more than the cutoff for the civil services. So that's the major hurdle for this exam.

The exam is allowed to be taken by only science and engineering graduates and since percentage of engineering graduates is increasing in the civil services mix and registration process for prelims is same, almost everyone ticks the option to be considered for IFS too, and since number of seat is only 110 for IFS thus number of people qualify for mains is also much smaller i,e around 1200 and thus cutoff marks is very high.

After taking on the chance to appear in this exam compromising on the very crucial time for civils mains (IFS mains was just 10 days before civil mains) and fighting it through midst the initial days of demonetization and reading one extra optional forestry only for 4 days I was only little hopeful for the interview call. When UPSC delayed the result by almost a month that added to the anxiety but when result came I had made it to the interview.

The thrill of appearing before the interview board for the first time and getting judged on personality made the days past very fast. However after the interview the wait of 5 days for the result was unending.  Finally the good news came. UPSC had recommended me for the appointment in Indian Forest Service.

Now starts the preparation of the walking test.

Earlier medical and walking test use to be along with interview and after that recommended list was published by UPSC but since last year they declare the list first and made only selected people go for medical and walking test.

Below I will be describing my preparation for the test in detail and how walking test is conducted and what strategy can be adopted  to easily sail through this arduous test.

We were three friends who were selected, so the practicing long walk was not as monotonous. By constantly motivating and pushing one another we managed to go for practice for 10-12 days before the final test and I guess that is sufficient.

We practiced usually for 10 Km walk daily and in the middle we pushed ourselves for 15 Km on every alternate days. One day we decided to go for the kill and walked for close to 25 Km. That was painful. Thankfully we had done it 10 days ahead of test and thus we had time to heal. But that maximum push brought couple of important issues to the fore.

1. Good shoe is very important. 
2. If you will tire yourself unnecessarily early in the walk rest of the journey is going to be painful.
3. Walking after 15 Km takes more time.
4. Adequate hydration at periodic interval is very important.

Buy a good shoe that is specially designed for walking or running. These shoes have extra foam in their sole and it will protect the feet from developing blisters which is a common phenomena if your shoe is not right. These are designed to let your feet breath. There are specially designed socks as well with extra padding around heel and toe area and they tightly cusp the feet which minimize the pain. Investment in good shoe and socks is every penny worth.

The test is conducted in National Zoological Park, Delhi popularly known as Delhi Zoo. It has been the venue for the test since generation so it will be so for coming generation too. This year it is almost heat wave condition in Delhi but still they did not change the venue. 

The walk test usually starts 30-45 min after the reporting time as they have some paper work to do. They make identity card which all participants hang around their neck during walk. Thus don't forget to bring 4-5 recent photographs. A number is assigned to everyone which is written on the identity card along with photograph.

This is a 2.5 Km stretch in the zoo which has to be repeated 10 times for the compete 25 Km (for female 5 and half round for 14 Km). The duration for test is of 4 hour which is same for male and female candidate. 

As it can be seen from the google map, for normal walk it will take 30 min to cover 2.5 Km but according to time duration given to us we must complete one round in 24 min. Thus brisk walk is required and that too we must sustain it for 4 straight hours. 

Along with physical capability and stamina, mental strength is also required with the conviction that Yes! it can be done and I will do it. 

Couple of very important points 

• Have a good strategy.
• Test it beforehand
• Have absolute faith on it.
• Don't abandon it midway.

This was my strategy to complete 6 rounds in 2 hours i,e  20 min per round. Now this can be done with brisk walking and slight jogging for 200-300 m . The zoo road have slopes at 2-3 places so jogging spots can be chosen at these slopes as this will be less strenuous. Since at the start we have energy so this can be achieved without much effort. Now after completing 6 rounds in 2 hour I am left with 2 hour to complete 4 rounds i,e 30 min per round, which can be done by normal walk enjoying the weather and sight of peacock on the roads. After 1 hour i,e 3 rounds, start drinking glucose in the middle of every round that will not let muscle form lactic acid and thus pain can be avoided. Use volini (pain spray) around the calf muscle area and thigh at the end of 7-8th round that will be enough for last 2 rounds.

Have faith on the strategy and don't abandon it midway seeing someone getting ahead of you. Keep watch on your watch and stick to your time.

We started the test at 5:45 AM. The weather was cool. slight breeze was penetrating through extra porous sports t-shirt. Around 36 people started the race but within 5 min the crowd spread out according to their own strategy. I had a friend with me with whom I had practiced and we had the same plan so we stuck together. 1-2 more people decided to go along with us.  We completed first round in 21 min. I was feeling little pain in my shin area. But I managed to recover the lost 1 min in second round and by the end of 60 min I was done with third round. Second and third round were easier than the first one. I guess leg muscles were conditioned.

Sun had risen spreading its red hue all over. Most of the animals were still sleeping except some birds and peacocks (They were in plenty). Suddenly the clam atmosphere of zoo got reverberated by loud noise. The king of jungle had woken from the slumber. The loud roar was majestic and thrilling. There was huge wall along the enclosure so Lion was not visible to us from our walking path but its sound sent turmoil among the pack of beautiful dears and antelopes. The view was nice and refreshing. Enjoying everything we kept moving on.

We had to collect token form the middle of the round and submit it after completion of the round. People at those counters were active. They use to read our number printed on our identity card around our neck from a distance and were ready with the token. Token was a steel round big coin like object with our number printed on it and number of the round which we were doing. Refreshment counter was at both places (where we were receiving and submitting token ). The items in refreshments were water, glucose, lemon, banana, Tiger biscuit.

One man was standing there who was continuously mixing glucose with water and the glass was ready for us to drink. But the amount of glucose he was mixing was very little. So one tip, pore more glucose in the glass and make your own drink. That was very helpful. It never let me feel tired. One thing that was missing was electrolyte. As after 2-3 hour it became warm and we were loosing sweat. I could feel the need of electrolyte. So 1-2 pack of electral can be carried in the pocket and just mix it with water and take after 6-7 rounds.

I completed 6 rounds in precise 2 hour. That was my first milestone. After completing that I ate one big banana. and took some biscuits in the pocket for munching and there after I only walked chatting with people.  After two more rounds i,e after 20 Km I could feel my muscles were at their limit. Then I sprayed volini on my both legs. I had taken 50 min for completing these two rounds. After that I was left with 70 min to complete two more round. That I comfortably did it 15 min remaining.

It was a happy feeling at the end. Everyone congratulated each other for clearing the last hurdle for this exam and becoming the officer. Good thing was no one was left and at the end everyone completed the test successfully.

I did a little bit of cooling down exercise. This is very important if you want to save yourself from the pain afterwards. This includes leg stretching, bending, back stretching. Then I washed my face with cool water , oh! the sweet feeling it gives. then sat for 15-20 min under fan in the zoo director's office. Then booked cab and returned.

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सवाल

काली रातों में टिमटिमाते तारे ऐसे लगते  हैं जैसे
हकीकत के समंदर में ख़्वाबो के टापू  ।

तारों के होने से रोशनी तो नहीं मिलती मगर
रोशनी होने का एह्शाश जरूर हो जाता है ।

ख्वाबो में रहकर हकीकत से छुटकारा तो नहीं मिलता
मगर खुशनुमे हकीकत का एक नजारा जरूर मिल जाता है ।

अंधरे - रोशनी , ख़्वाब - हकीकत इनकी जद्दो जिहद में
जिंदगी का कारवाँ आगे निकल ही चलता है ।

सवालों की गर्मी और जवाबों के बयार ऐसी जुगलबंदी करते हैं
मानो पुश्तैनी रिश्ता हो इनका ।

दुसरो के सवालों की गर्मी के लिए तो छतरी भी लगा लो
लेकिन खुद के जो सवाल हैं उनसे कोई कैसे बचे ।

क्या हर सवाल का जवाब होता है ?
क्या हर जवाब का अस्तित्व सवाल से ही होता है ?

चाँद का बैरी कौन ? चांदनी रातों में अँधेरा छटने के साथ साथ
तारों  की चमक भी धूमिल हो जाती है ।

बड़े टापूओ पर पहुच जाने वालों को छोटे टापुओ के पिघलने
से दर्द क्यों नहीं होता ?

जिंदगी के पैमाने नापते नापते इतनी दूर निकल जाते हैं
की प्रतीत  होता है शायद ये माप ही ज़िन्दगी हो ।

- चंचल प्रकाशम्

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Do Result Justify Means?

Should we accept that everything we did was great, if the outcome was a resounding success? Should we not learn from our successes too, as we are told to learn from our failures?

There is always a luck (uncertainty) factor in every success and once may be your compromises got overcompensated by luck factor, but you cannot always bank upon that. for example you didn't prepare one chapter but still you topped the exam because no question came from that chapter, that doesn't mean you should have not read all chapters and you can always top, leaving something behind.
No success is absolute, life is a race and you will always have bigger competition to participate in and always bigger goals to achieve.

I think that the biggest mistake that one can make is to assume that everything they did to succeed was good, or even worse if they believe that the compromises they made to succeed are justified after success.

So No, result do not always justify all means taken to achieve this.

When they say don't let the victory get to your head, I guess this is what they mean.

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Hierarchy, Not a very good thing

Everyone has got some level of stupidity or intelligence in them. Someone has less, someone has more. But when many people interact, this level cancels out and comes down to the average of the group. So if average is more than normal that team performs better and if average is less than normal, things do not go down very well.
However If strict hierarchical structure is created then the stupidity level of people at the top tier magnify as much that it almost nullify everyone below them. Then everything comes down to the people or person at the hierarchical crest. If they are intelligent than normal you will succeed and if they are stupid then good luck to you,  and that is less favorable situation for any organisation which aims to grow.

Don't create hierarchy, create a stimulating environment where people can thrive on their potential and can contribute to their fullest. 

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शफेद रंग

रंगो से भरे पंख फड़फड़ाती तितली रंगो के पीछे ही भागती है ।
कभी कभी तो ऐसा लगता है जैसे उसे पता ही नहीं
की कितने रंगीन हैं उसके खुद के पंख
काश कभी ठहर कर,
साँस लेकर देख पाती अपने रंगीन पंखो को ,
काश कुछ देर रुक कर आत्मलोकन  कर पाती
शायद उसकी ज़िन्दगी भी रंगीन हो जाती
उन फूलो की रंगो की तरह जिनके फीछे रोज़ भागती है वो ।

मगर इतनी फुर्शत किसे कि कोई ठहरे
अगर रुकेंगे तो पीछे नहीं छूट जायेंगे
लाइफ इज़ अ रेस, एंड यू हाव टु रन फ़ास्ट टू विन
दौड़ो और तेज़ दौड़ो , और तेज़
बहुत तेज़ दौड़ा था वो, इतना तेज़
की सबसे आगे की पंक्ति में खड़ा था
जब पीछे मुड़ के देखा तो दूर दूर तक ज़िन्दगी कही दिखाई नहीं दी ।

पिला रंग
लाल रंग
बैंगनी रंग
हरा रंग
रोज़ तन्मयता से लाती थी
और संजो के रखती थी वो रंगो को।
दिन में चैन नहीं रात को आराम नहीं ,
सांस कैसे ले सकती हैं, जब तक सारे रंग बटोर न ले ,
पुरखो से सुनती आई है सबने कोशिश की
पर कोई सारे रंगो का एक साथ सुख न ले सका है अभी तक ,
मेहनत तो करनी पड़ेगी, दस्तूर के मुह पर तमाचा जो मारना है ।

अंतिम रंग बचा था मिलाने को
शायद ज़िन्दगी का अंतिम पहर भी हो
सभी रंगो की झिलमिलाती रौशनी में नहाना चाहती थी
मगर ये क्या?
अंतिम रंग मिलते ही सबकुछ रंगहीन हो चूका था
आँखो में तैर रहे थे रंग,  मगर चेहरा शफेद पड़ा हुआ था
कहाँ गए रंग?

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Truth Beyond The Canvas

Hanging in the gallery were those paintings

They saw a mirthful girl, with wavy silky hair
playing with the wind as she was marching ahead,
I could see the fear of femicide in her eyes
entrenched since before she was even born.

They saw a boy playing in park
trying to jump to catch a ball,
I could see the weight of expectations
loaded on his back pulling him down.

They saw leafless trees in barren region
standing timidly as silhouette,
I could see the hope of spring
on the those skinny branches.

They saw the resplendent scattered light of
glorious morning sun from undulating river water,
I could see the bitter and sanguinary thoughts
hatched in the darkness before dawn.

They saw a  perennial tree by the side
of a small hut and a old man sitting on ground,
I could see his wife sitting inside that hutch
beside broken utensils and cold stove.


-Chanchal Prakasham

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मिनरल वाटर

कच्ची सड़क से धूल उड़ाते हुए गुजरते
कार के शीशे से बाहर फेंके जाने पर
उसे अहसास हुआ कितनी गर्मी है बाहर,
शायद वातानुकूलित पिंजड़े के अंदर
सूरज की भी मर्ज़ी नहीं चलती |

कारों का काफिला गुजरने और
धूल का गुबार पसरने के बाद उसे दिखा
सुखतीं फसलें , फसलों को आशाहीन नजरों
से देखते किसानो के सपाट चेहरे के पीछे
छिपा हुआ दर्द और उनके मुरझाए हुए सपने  |

उसने अनुमान लगाया शायद यही है
ड्राउट प्रोन कंट्रीसाइड,
जिसके बारे में कार के अन्दर के लोग बात कर रहे थे
घिन आने लगी थी उसे अपने बोतल में कैद जिंदगी से  |

कुछ कर गुजरने की तमन्ना लिए
कर दिया खुद को समर्पण
सूरज की किरणों के सम्मुख |

भाप बन उड़ चला था गगन को चूमने
ठंडक और सुकून था ऊपर की हवावों में
बस अगर कुछ नहीं था, तो वो थी संवेदना  |

बादलों के बीच पहुच कर सुना दिया उसने दर्द भरा वृत्तांत
कहानी की वेदना से धधक उठी थी चिंगारी आकाश में
उमड़ पड़ी बादलों की सारी फ़ौज उसके आह्वान पर

अगले दिन खबर आई, सूखा ग्रस्त इलाके में जम कर हुई बारिस
सैकड़ो गाँव बाढ़ में तबाह |



- चंचल प्रकाशम्

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Babies Born Behind Bars

Once upon a time, there was a king who feared
his death from babies of next generation,
apparently some astrologer told him so.

His life was dear to him, so he issued an order
to put behind bars all the gravid ladies of his kingdom.
He could have killed those women but sadly
that would have lowered the "human rights index".

Women were arrested and kept in possible farthest jail.
They delivered babies, took care of them for few months,
babies were chained and mothers were forced out. 
Babies started growing in the darkest jail of that time.

As they were human babies they maneuvered themselves
in the darkness  and started aging happily,
dark was their god, dark were their thoughts
They even dreamed darkly.

The only ornament they had, was their chains
They took care of it as their vital body parts.
They used it for music they used it for war
even organized  competition to determine mightiest so far. 

During competition, chain of a puny man broke,
He was labeled challenged and was out-casted.
He started spending his time in other things, at other corner,
with the broken piece of his chain he started scratching the wall

While scratching, the chain got hot and he got brunt finger
He unleashed his frustration on the wall,
hit repeatedly with his hot chain until it sparked
He told his few friends about this new blinding thing.

Words got out and mightiest of them came
and crushed him with their mightiest chain
for discovering something blinding and unfaithful.
He was thrown back in the same distant corner.

Forgetting his pain he again started scratching and hitting the wall
really the wall was not too strong and not too thick
it started cracking, he kept on scratching and hitting,
Finally a stone came out and prison was filled with blazing light.

People came running towards it covering their eyes
they were scared, they were terrified, puny man was leaping,
as he had seen the outside world with his watery eyes.

Mightiest of them came all frowned on this light of disbeliever 
They killed the puny man with their mightiest chain and
stuffed his bones in the vent, again there was darkness all around.




 - Chanchal Prakasham

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Conscience Vs Legality

After the hectic scheduled first three weeks of December, finally I was going home to spend remaining days of the year with my parents. There was sudden surge in chill and I had to catch train from Howrah. From Kharagpur I boarded a 2:30 PM local which was bound to reach Howrah at 5:00 PM, and my train to home was to leave Howrah at 5:45 PM. I have unflinching faith on the local trains which are famous for their strict commute time, that's why I had kept a buffer time of just 45 minutes. The train reached close to the station at 5 O' clock but stopped few hundreds of meters away from the platform. After my lot of praying it again started and finally I reached the station at 5:30 PM.

Now I had to take something to eat and catch the train. If you have ever been at Howrah station you must be aware of its atmosphere. Around 23 platforms and that's too divided in old and new station, and thousands of people on the station at all time like there is some mela going on. My first task was to search from which platform my train was scheduled to start, luckily that wasn't tough, thanks to continuously updating electronic boards. Since failing to catch train is one of my nightmare so I had to drop my idea of eating egg roll and vada pav at the store by the side of Food Plaza, which is by the way one of the perks of catching train to home from Howrah and not from kharagpur directly.(though there are two trains daily from Kharagpur to Dehri-on-Sone). I hastily reached to my coach walking briskly 200m, put my bag on seat and came out looking for some vendors. 3 min was still left, luckily I found a vendor very close to my coach, bought chocolate chip cookies and bottle of water, ordered tea, but train had blown its horn so after canceling the order, I returned to my seat. 

It was already dark outside but the coach was glowing in its numerous tube-lights. As the train started moving, cold wind gushed in, first I found it refreshing may be because I was feeling warm, owe it to my brisk walk, but suddenly I felt the chill. People hurriedly started lowering the window pan, in a couple of minutes the coach was almost sealed. After seating for about 20 min on the side lower seat as no one had yet arrived at that seat, I went on to my seat, ate cookies, drank water, set alarm and went in deep sleep lulled in the lap of train.

Around 8 O' clock the TTE came, wake me up and asked for ticket and ID card which I showed, then he moved on. I tried again to go back to sleep then I heard some noise, when listened carefully it was the discussion going on between TTE and some passenger in my next compartment. There were two ladies one around 30-35 and other around 60 years. The TTE was asking to produce photo ID card along with ticket and the both women were saying vote photo nahi hai humare pass kaha se dikhaye, station par bas ticket hi diya (We don't have photo identity card, we got only ticket at the ticket counter.) The TTE said "without photo identity card your ticket is invalid and either you pay fine or Rs. 1100 or get off the train". I was kind of getting impressed with his honesty. The elder woman said "sahab pahli bar reservation bogi me chadhe hain humko pata nahi tha ki vote photo bhi chahiye hota hai ticket ke sath aur humko koi bataya bhi nahi aur humare pass itna paisa nahi hai fine dene ke liye" (Sir for the first time I am traveling in reservation coach and I didn't know that we need photo identity card along with ticket and no one even told me so and I don't have that much money to pay fine). The TTE said look, this is not my fault that no one told you, you don't waste my time pack your bag and get ready to get down the train. The younger woman said almost crying kaha jayenge shahab hum itni raat ko? (Where we will go sir, in this night?) The TTE said it's none of my business, you get ready with your bags, I will come when the train stops. His voice seemed as icy as was the gushing wind when train had started moving.

When TTE left the coach the old woman came to me sobbing and said "babu tohra pass vote id hai? dekha na humara pass ticket hai phir bhi ye TTE bol raha ki itni raat ko train se phek dega".(Babu do you have the photo identity card? See I have proper ticket but TTE is saying he will throw me out of train.) She told me she was from some village near Mirzapur and the lady accompanying her was her daughter-in-law, and her husband was traveling in general coach in the same train. I told her since 1st of December 2012 its a rule that you must carry identification card otherwise you ticket will be considered invalid. She hopelessly asked other passengers too. Many of them were not aware of this rule but since they had ID card so they had been spared from TTE's " harassment". Just to console her I along with other passengers said "theek hai aap jaiye soiye apne seat par, phek kaise dega humlog hain na, chinta mat kijiye" (you go and sleep on your seat, we are here how can he throw you away ? Don't worry, we will talk to him.) Of course that pacified her a little bit, she went to her seat and sat there.

Now it got me thinking what would I say to TTE when he would finally come.  He was not wrong but surely he was being inconsiderate. No way a rule enforced just 20-25 days back would be known to a village woman. Who was at fault?  The women? The TTE? Ticket-teller? Or the railway authority? The ignorance because of illiteracy is not a crime or is it?


P.S:- Finally when TTE came, we requested him and said that her husband is in general coach and he might be having the ration card. After lot of persuasion he left after giving them warning to be careful from next time.  I told her to spread the word in her village so that next time no other person from her village get in trouble.
       

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Where Did God Come From?

Yeah! you read it right. This question popped up in my mind when whole country is in festive mood of celebrating Navratri and Dussehra. Actually there is set of questions

1. We created God or God created us? 2. where did God come from?  3. Is God immortal?  4. Do God really protect us when we worship? 5. What if we are atheists?  

Let us find out the answer which makes some sense. No I am not an atheist. I am a man of science who believes in god. I presume science and religion should go hand in hand and this would be the perfect moment to quote Albert Einstein 

Science without Religion is lame and Religion without Science is blind.

 Einstein was right but I don't know what he had in mind when he said this. He was a truly remarkable man and I guess he believed in god though many historians says he was not a religious person.

Anyway lets contemplate a little bit about life before moving on God.  Whats the basic purpose of life? I guess its survival. We breath to live, we eat to live, we sense our environment to live, in short, we live to live. This is true for all living organism and not only for human. We go into all sorts of troubles to ensure our survival. A bird learn to fly, a deer learn to run, a cat learn to jump, we humans educate ourselves right from our birth. why? So that we get enough resources for our livelihood. But a bird don't know for sure which direction to fly to get enough food without meeting its own predators, a deer don't know for sure which direction to run to outrun lion without getting her horns entangled in bushes, we don't know for sure which path to choose to get success. There are uncertainties everywhere and at every moment. We are not sure of whats going to happen next so we made God. We can't predict the future so we made God. God is just a faith inside our conscience that make us believe that coming moment won't be a threat to our survival. Had there been no God we wouldn't have taken a step forward or backward fearing a lighting may strike that place or rock may fall on our head(since probability of these are more than zero). So we keep God in our heart and move fearlessly believing that lighting would strike anywhere but on us. So its the moment of uncertainties which leads to the birth of God. If a man is standing at war front facing coming bullets, where probability of getting hit by bullet in neither zero nor one, must have something to hold on. That is God.  

But the more experienced and acquainted with the forest a deer is, more certain it is for her to choose right direction. The more educated  a man is, it is more certain for him to choose a befitting career path with lesser probability of failure . The better equipped and trained a soldier is, the more will be his chance of not getting hit. In all these cases there will be lesser chance of failure and subsequently lesser dependency on God.

The God takes birth from the womb of tossed coin and die as soon as coin settles.  

There is no God, there is just faith to overcome fear of uncertainty. Every moment God takes birth and every moment he dies. The more we will equip ourselves to predict future, the lesser will be the life time of god. The day we will write an equation which governs all worldly phenomena, the God will cease to exist, until then he is immortal.  

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Pendulum: Tracing a Life Curve

From where to start? I haven't slept for like 40 hours, right now sitting in lab studying about nuclear bombardment and its effect on thin film, undergoing a very unusual kind of screwed thoughts process, so a little piece of warning before you start reading. This post is being written in a very "unstable" frame of mind.

Well enough with the caution. let’s get back to original content. For making a thin film, we have to first create a capacitor and for that I was cutting a aluminium foil with a scissor hanging with the help of a thread pivoted in wall. The purpose of keeping that scissor in that fashion was to avoid its misplacement. In life nature has pivoted us with some responsibilities, relationships to avoid our misplacement in this world full of yearning. I took the scissor cut the foil and left it, and then I saw something that I would like to share. The scissor underwent damped oscillation. It was not like that I was witnessing oscillation for the first time, being a Physics Student I have studied in a very detailed manner about all aspect of oscillation but this time I got different outcome. As a fact of physics that tell us that


"In any experiment we get the result what we are looking for, the outcome of experiment is not independent, it depends on who is performing experiment and with what mindset"

So what I observed was, when I left scissor, "she" fell down tracing a semi-circular curve and went past her lowest trajectory point with maximum velocity, but she slowed down when approached the highest point as if she was longing to reach there all her life. She almost stopped there for few time, but alas! life is not fair, it won’t give you what you want, it will give you what you deserve. Feeling very unfortunate of herself, scissor decided to change her love spot, again she went past the lowest point with high velocity (not as high as before) and slowly and smoothly came up, touched her new love spot, wished to stay there forever but again gravity (fate) pulled her down. Again she regressed the same process but what was different in her approach was, though the velocity of going past the lowest point was higher in her whole motion for that round but it was decreasing as compared to the last one (she was getting tired), similarly her love spot was coming down and down with each failure. Each time she tried to move past the lowest point as quickly as possible but since gravity had already decided her destination her all craving went in vain and she got her peace at the point she was avoiding all through her life..

    

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अतीत

याद है तुम्हे वो काली स्याही सी रात

जब हम  मिले थे

दिल के धड़कन के आगे

ट्रेन की आवाज़ भी सुनाई नहीं पड़ती थी ।

तुम्हारा उठ के आना

चेहरे पर मुस्कान लिए

हाथ मिलाने के लिए आगे बढ़ाना

सब कुछ सुहाने सपने सा लगता है ।

आँखों के इशारो में इतनी पैनी धार थी की

शब्द छत विछत होकर बिखर गए थे

लेकिन  उस ख़ामोशी में भी सुकून था

और आज सुकून हीं खामोशियो से भरा है ।

बाहर ठिठुरती ठण्ड थी

फिर भी दिलों में नरमी और गर्मी थी

आज बाहर का मौसम  इतना गर्म  हैं 

फिर भी  दिलों में बर्फ जमी है ।

-  चंचल  प्रकाशम्  

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अवस्था

मैंने बहुत कोशिश  की

तुमसे दूर जाने की

पर हर बार जब भी

सैकड़ो मिल दूर

चलने  के बाद

वापस मुड़ का देखता हूँ,

तो खुद को तुम्हारे

उतने ही करीब पता हूँ |

या तो तुम्हारे समीप

वृत्त की परिधि

बन गया हूँ  मै ,

या इस सफ़र में तुम भी

मेरे साथ चल रही हो

समान दुरी बनाये हुए |

- चंचल  प्रकाशम्  

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Worst Fear

I am not moving a step forward
fearing, it might creep you out.

I am not moving a step backward
fearing, I might lose something which otherwise would have been mine.

I am unable to stand there
fearing, I might be left longing forever.

But my worst fear is not,
me not moving anywhere

its the incognizance of your whereabout
and what if, you are in the same dilemma.



- Chanchal Prakasham

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ठहराव

तपती मरुभूमि में मरूद्यान सी

प्रतीत हुई थी तुम्हारी आँखें

थके निर्जलित पथिक की तरह

बिना सोचे ही कूद पड़ा था खुद को सराबोर करने ।

तुम मंजिल नहीं थी,

ना तो थी तुम रास्ता

तुम तो बस एक ठहराव थी

जहाँ प्यास बुझाने को रुका था कारवां हमारा ।

गर्म हवा की लपटों से बचने और

सूखते कंठ को तर करने के आनन-फानन में

तैरने ना आने का संज्ञान विलुप्त सा हो गया था

तुम्हारी आँखों में गहराई बहुत थी, मै डूब गया ।

- चंचल प्रकाशम्

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उम्मीदों की किश्ती

समंदर को पार  करने की  ख्वाहिश में

उम्मीदों की एक किश्ती बनायीं थी 

आत्मविश्वास के झोको ने धक्का भी लगाया था 

दुआओं  की लहरें भी सफ़र का सहारा बनी थी 

डगमगाते हीं सही पर किस्ती बढ़ चली थी ।

किनारों का शोर और कोलाहल छूट चूका था 

मन में उमंगो की तरंगे कई इन्द्रधनुष बना रहे थे 

आशा की हल्की हल्की धुप में मौसम खुशनुमा था 

क्षितिज को देख के लगता नहीं था मंजिल दूर होगी ।

सफ़र का वेग तेज़ था 

छोटे छोटे टापुओ को देख हौसला अफजाई भी हुई थी 

मगर समंदर का अपना ही अज़ीब  शोर था, गरज़ना थी 

हवाओ के झोको में नमी थी, गर्मी थी  और अज़ीब सा गंध था 

खुद से क्षितिज की दूरी कम होते न देख मन व्याकुल हो उठा ।

आत्मविश्वास के झोके धीमे पड़ने लगे हैं 

दुआओं की लहरें थमी हुई  सी लगने लगी है 

ये कैसी अज़ीब सी उदासी है, पानी पर तैरते हुए बर्फ़ और 

अति-आत्मविश्वास के तुफानो की चेतावनी तो दी थी लोगो ने 

मगर इस उदासी के बारे में किसी ने नहीं बताया था ।

शायद विषुव-प्रशांत है ये, ये वक़्त भी गुज़र जायेगा  

फिर से ख़ुशी के बयार बहेंगे , फिर से अच्छी धुप खिलेगी 

फिर से इंद्रधनुषी सपने आयेंगे, फिर से लहरों में चंचलता आएगी 

डगमगाते हीं सही पर किस्ती बढ़ चलेगी ।

- चंचल प्रकाशम्

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यादें

पलक झपकाते हीं तेरा चेहरा नज़र आता है
नींद उड़ जाती है बस ख्वाब रह जाता है,
ख्वाबों की फंखुडिया समेटते समेटते, सवेरा हो जाता है,
और सुबह की हकीकत हृदय को अंधकार में धकेल देता है |

ये अँधेरा भी अजीब है सब कुछ दिखता है इसमें
जो न देखना चाहो उसकी चमक और भी प्रबल होती है,
अँधेरे की चमक से व्याकुल आँखे, आँसू की नदियाँ बहाती है,
और उन आँसू की नदियों से बने समंदर में दिल डूब सा जाता है |


सुनामी सी ऊची होते हुए भी लहरे न जाने क्यूँ
समय की रेत पर बने चिन्हों को मिटा नहीं पातीं,
उन अमिट सी चिन्हों में ही घिसती हुई ज़िन्दगी सोचती है
ए चंचल मन तू चंचल ही क्यू न रहा |


- चंचल प्रकाशम्

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